Me and my fiancee are having differents opinions about the wedding...?

I am trying to cut corners with the wedding to make it as inexpensive as possible. I am doing alot myself to try and save money. My parents agreed to pay for it but they are not real well off money wise and he wants to go to Davids Bridal to buy the flower girl dresses. He has one daughter and I have one and they are both going to be flower girls. I don't see paying 100 dollars and above for a flower girl dress when I feel as if I can get one cheaper. He wants to do David Bridal and does not seem to want to budge. I think it is unfair to expect for my parents to put out any more money than they have too. He said he would buy his daughters dress and I buy my daughters dress. Any suggestion on what I can do to get him to change his mind and look elsewhere??? Do you think I am being unresonable??? Please be honest...

Me and my fiancee are having differents opinions about the wedding...?
Personally, I do not think the conflict is worth $200. I absolutely understand being in a financial "squeeze" so I can relate to the issue completely.





Another perspective is that it's wonderful that he is willing to honor both daughters with dresses from a retailer that is known for quality. If the price is simply too high, I would thank him for his obvious desire to bless the girls, but suggest that you have another option. This also means that another option should have already been found.





So, if the price is really worth fighting for, do a little homework and find a reasonable compromise. Make sure to acknowledge the value of his desire to give the girls the best, and I think you two should be able to find a happy middle ground.





Congrats!
Reply:If this is the only thing he is requesting, let him have it. Cut costs elsewhere. If there are several things that he is requesting that is out of the budget, then compromise with him and ask him which one is more important to him. Marriage is compromise, not always getting your way. Its also about choosing your battles and again I say if this is his only request, the dresses, let him have it, he only wants the girls to look beautiful, they are really a representation of their parents.
Reply:Tell him it is your wedding not his.....
Reply:If he's going to buy them, then let him have his way. Obviously it means alot to him, and if it helps make the day special for him, why not? Your parents aren't going to have to pay for it if he does. I bet he'd do it for you if you had your heart set on it.
Reply:do a little window shopping on your own to see what kind of dresses you can find for cheaper prices. if you find some that you really want, then show them to him. hopefully he'll come around. he's the one being unreasonable, not you.
Reply:Well, I think you are being unreasonable not just because you won't pay for your own daughter's dress. Since you have a child, you and your guy should be paying for your own wedding! Totally - what are you thinking?
Reply:What about looking on e-bay for a used David's Bridal dress? That would definitely be cheaper.
Reply:you shouldn't want to take advantage, but i agree with the buying your own daughters dresses, why do your parents have to pay for absolutely everything, you guys can help out, and even ask his parents to help out. It is his wedding too, he has some say on what he wants.
Reply:You are not being unreasonable - he is! You are being practical and considerate, while he's being selfish. What's so special about Davids Bridal - what's wrong with a dress that doesn't cost as much but looks just as nice? He's starting this marriage off on the wrong foot if he can't learn to compromise!
Reply:Why is he so hung up on Davids Bridal? Is there a specific reason that he wants to go there?





If he is really hung up on doing Davds bridal why dont you go there pick out the dress you want then go online and find the same dress, I know the website www.hopuseofbrides.com carry most of the same dresses as Davids bridal, but they are SO much cheaper, so you have a good chance of finding the same dress just at a cheaper price.





I dont think you are being unreasonable in the least, unless he has some spectacular reason for demanding that store, I wouldnt shop there and pay their over blown prices by choice either.





Good luck!
Reply:It's his wedding too
Reply:If I were you, I would check out ebay, maybe you could find 2 david's bridal flower dresses on there for cheap. Then you both would be happy!
Reply:I would check on e-bay or craig's list for dresses. Most little dresses like this get worn once and therefore are usable again. Shop sales too.





I have no idea what town you are in, but I just did a quick search in San Fransisco Craig's list, and there were a ton of results!
Reply:I recently got married and my sister in law got the flower girl dresses from this website. http://www.gagas.com/





Hope this helps you. The dresses are really nice looking and look like they are from a bridal store, such as David's Bridal.
Reply:Easter is coming and they have pretty dresses during the easter season for little girls. Definitely take him shopping with you and show him you can get prettier dresses for wayy less money, especially since its only a one day dress.
Reply:you are not being unreasonable--I would say very sensible,if that what he wants let him pay for them both---see what his reaction is. good luck-------
Reply:If there is a particular dress that he is wanting at DB, search around to see if you can find a dress similar at another store that will be less expensive. If there is not a certain dress that he has his "eyes" on, continue to search for a dress elsewhere. There are inexpensive dresses for little girls everywhere that are of just a good quality as DB. You probably have to shown him better than you can tell him. You should be able to find really good dresses now since it is getting close to Easter. Best Wishes!
Reply:Extend your wedding date, scrimp the money you need over time and do it his way,.......Why make a mountain out of a mole hill you dont want to start being married arguing


Relationships often require compromise
Reply:Since I've never been to David's, I can't judge how much they'll cost there. Why not go there with him, and have a look? Then you'll both know if it's beyond your reach or not.





Another alternative would be to find a seamstress who can make these dresses. If you were to choose a simple style and provide the material and trimmings, that could be done for a reasonable price.
Reply:I'm with you.


My niece was a flower girl and bride simply asked her parents to put her in any dress she already owned - color didn't matter.


The point is that you want the kids in your wedding - not what dress they are going to wear.


Couple points - how much time is there until the wedding? If there are months, you might be able to point out how fast kids grow out of clothes and its not a good idea to buy such an expensive dress if there is a change it won't fit the kids later.
Reply:First off, I totally understand about saving the money. Your parents should not be paying for the flower girl dresses, thats the responsibility of you and your fiance. I suggest seeing if you can find some dresses for less. Go to JCPenny and if you find some buy them and show them to him, if he likes them great! If he doesn't return them. If it's that important tell him you'll go to David's Bridal, but you'll have to cut costs somewhere else.
Reply:I think you are being unreasonable by assuming that your parents should pay for the dresses, yes. I think that if your parents are paying for the wedding, their costs include church, hall, food, drinks, MAYBE flowers, and maybe your dress. Other than that you two people need to start spending some of your own money. Specially if you each have a kid already.
Reply:Have you considered that he wants the girls to feel special and that they are part of this new marriage as well? I think it is sweet that he wants to make this special for them. Going to a place like Davids Bridal, (or any REAL bridal/wedding store) will make the girls feel like they a part of this new union as well. If $200 isnt going to break the two of you, I'd say go for it. Both of your children will remember feeling special too for a long time.
Reply:I think you might reconsider who you are marrying.
Reply:If he is going to buy the dress, let him buy it. This is nothing to cause a stir over. At the same time, he needs to realize that he is a man and not make a big deal out of anything. He should do whatever makes you happy. I am getting married soon also and as long as my future wife is happy, I could care less what goes on with the planning of the wedding.

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